One year ago
This time last year I was with my entire family at the hospital as doctors had told us to come in and say our goodbyes to my grandma, one year later she's still alive and kicking. I figured since it's been a year i'd share this story with you. Most of you know I try to keep the blog lighthearted and don't go too much into my personal life but this is a story i'd like to share and I even touched on it a bit this time last year but not in great detail. I am going to have to back track a bit and it might be long winded but stay with me.
I am not even sure where to begin but I think describing my relationship with my grandma is a good place to start. My grandma and I have always been super close, and I really feel like a reason for that would be because she helped raise me for about 3 months one year. Going back to 1989-90 when I had my kidney transplant I wasn't allowed back in school right away by my doctors due to germs and what not, and my grandma immediately suggested she watch me so my mom and dad(both teachers) could go back to work. So starting in January for 5 days a week my mom would drop me off at my grandma's at 7 am and my dad would pick me up at 3:30 translation we spent a LOT of time together. She would make me breakfast, we would watch all her favorite tv shows, price is right, soap opera's(yes, I got hooked for a time on the young and the restless, and as the world turns thanks to my grandma) we'd always go through McDonalds drive thru for lunch, and the only time spent apart would be when my tutor would come to keep me updated my school work. I loved every minute of it, but mostly the laughter and I feel I like ever since then I have had a special bond with my Grandma.
Fast forward to recent times, and her health has been deteriorating she has either dementia or alzheimer's she won't let us take her to the doctor to be diagnosed. However, she was still living on her own in a HUGE house and was pretty stubborn anytime someone brought up her moving. However, she started to take some falls, which led to her having both knees replaced, one fall she went out to get her mail and fell in her driveway and broke her hip, but the worst came when she fell around Feb of 2010 in her kitchen and broke her femur, but what was even worse was she had been down on the ground for almost 5 hours before anyone found her. She is so tough though she went through all of those set backs basically just taking asprin. So, anyway over that spring break when my relativers were in town from Georgia we decided to figure out what to do, as many suggestions were thrown out there from moving in with my mom, to moving to Georgia, to hiring 24 hour live in nurse but we ultimately decided on assisted living. We moved her in ironically enough on my birthday June 5th of 2010 and she went fighting and screaming! She settled in though after awhile, but even there her stubborness won out she wouldn't wear her life alert button.
Flash forward to this time last year, and it was around 3:30ish when I got a call from mom who I could tell had been crying and I immediately knew. My grandma had fallen during the night at her assisted living place, she wasn't found til the staff got worried when she didn't go down for lunch. She was in the hospital severly dehydrated, broken shoulder, and the doctors were certain she wouldn't make it through the night. So, all of us headed over to see her to say our goodbyes, our relatives flew in from Georgia and well she got better and even kind of returned to her normal self. Unfortunately, she couldn't just stay in the hospital she had to be moved and after touring facilities my mom, her brother and sister chose one where she would do light rehab. It gets a little crazy here, she didn't do well with the move and i'll never forget I was at a wedding that day and got the call again she was probably going to die if I wanted to say goodbye I needed to get to the rehab place. So, we skipped the wedding reception and headed over and sure enough everyone was there praying, crying, some singing, my grandma was even saying it was time to go, time to go. Well, the next day she had other plans as she made it again and was well enough they moved her to a private room in the rehab win. We had survived another scare, and though we knew the end would be coming sometime just maybe not as soon.
Last November after the stress of this situation started ease another phone call, it almost got to the point that anytime in the evening I got a call from my mom I got scared to answer. This time at the rehab place she had fallen down and was in really bad shape and rushed to the hospital. This time only my mom, her brother, and myself went and the doctor warned us this could be it again, and this time I thought for sure it was because she had to go through surgery. She broke her shoulder in that fall, and what could make this a longer story becareful where you put your loved ones when they are older. We found out that this rehab place was really understaff and a doctor had ordered my grandma under 24-7 watch when she was in the common room not only was nobody watching her when she fell, but without knowing her injuries got her up and put her back in the wheel chair before the ambulance arrived. My aunt who is a paralegal tried to sue but they said not enough evidence.
To make this very, I mean very long story short we didn't think she'd survive a third time but by Christmas she was perking up again, but her memory loss had gotten worse. She made it again, and she is now currently in a memory loss care that was on the other side of her assisted living facility so in a crazy way she's right back where this all started. She is doing well, she has her good days and bad days, and most times when I go to visit which is usually once a week she remembers who I am. She has fit in nicely at the memory care unit she flirts with the men, and likes to dance, and going in there can be quite entertaining with these people, but also sad. It's been a tough year, and a stressful one on our family but it definitely has brought us all closer. My mom continues to say my grandma just might outlive her, and at this point it's hard to argue.
Thanks for listening :)
Happy Halloween!
Phats